Healing the Black Holes of Your Life

I’m reading – or perhaps I should say working through – the book Find Your Purpose, Change Your Life by Carol Adreinne.  (As a side note, I have an extra copy of this book that I plan to give away on this site or on the Simple Life Facebook page  so do watch for that promotion. )  This quote was the page header for one of the chapters:

Ornate golden key on a ribbon“If aspects of the person remain undigested – cut off, denied, projected, rejected, indulged, or otherwise unassimilated – they become the points around which the core forces of greed, hatred, and delusion attach themselves.  They are black holes that absorb fear and create the defensive posture of the isolated self, unable to make satisfying contact with others or with the world.”

Mark Epstein, M.D., author of Thoughts Without a Thinker: Psychotherapy from a Buddhist Perspective

I wonder how much of our own needs and desires we deny?  How much do we tolerate on a daily basis?  Further, how many of us have been doing this for so long that we don’t even realize that we are living an auto-pilot life?  Or worse, living a life based on fear and defensiveness.  We run the risk of losing essential parts of our selves and blindly living a whitewashed life when we ignore our own vibrant characteristics.

Healing Your Life

What would we do or ask for if a magical fairy godmother appeared and said she would grant us a dozen small wishes that would allow us to be more authentic and to do the things that would allow us to ‘make satisfying contact with others in the world’?  Have we worn our masks and locked away our core talents for so long that we would not even know what to ask for?  Have we become so accustomed to “making do and making a living” that we don’t even know anymore which simple pleasures of our world would wake up our inner joy?

What talent, quirk, trait, activity, or expression are you denying or that you have neglected so long that you forgot you even enjoyed it? And do we hide these out of duty or out of fear that someone might criticize it?  Or did we just get in a rut that obscured our connection?  How do you begin healing your life, and finding authentic joy and meaning in each day?

I’m still thinking about this one and I think I’ll start a list of my own rusty-dusty aspects that are locked away, longing for expression.

May this help you to awaken those beautiful, sleeping parts that are surely inside you.  Namaste.




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2 Responses to “Healing the Black Holes of Your Life”

  1. Tony Khuon | Agile Lifestyle Says:

    I love these kinds of thought experiments. It’s staggering how out of touch with our own thoughts, feelings, and values we can become. In our careers and business life, we’re often told the value of feedback. Self-feedback might be the most important loop to close.

    Thanks for the lovely post!
    Tony Khuon | Agile Lifestyle recently posted..Happy Sleep: How the Neglected Third of Life Impacts HappinessMy Profile


  2. Patti Says:

    Tony, that is a good term, “self-feedback.” It covers both awareness and evaluation. Well said!


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