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I’m not sure when it started, this secret longing to take a dancing class.  Maybe it was years ago when I was at the  Chautauqua Institution in  New York, attending a writer’s conference.  At Chautauqua, there seemed to be small groups of dancers everywhere, wearing soft clothing and dreamily drifting to their next dance class.  I watched and wished I was walking with them.

Probably, though, the longing started sooner, like when I was in first grade and a new girl,  Sheri, got on my bus and sat beside me.  Sheri could sing and dance and I was totally mesmerized and a little intimidated by her talent.   She moved away by the end of the year, but the awe and intimidation has lingered.

When I found a local class, Hearts in Motion, that started with Nia dance and ended with yoga, I stayed on the sidelines and just thought about it for months.  I clicked on the website and dreamed.   The Nia Technique, it explained, was all about connecting with your own body and releasing your own energy.  In Nia, there are no “wrong” movements, “precision instead of perfection” is key.  Nia “teaches your body a new language.”  Self-expression at all levels of ability is honored.    Nia is creative and fun, it explained  And as a bonus, the class is a combination of two classes – Nia and Yoga- and ends with 45 min of yoga, which I already knew I’d enjoy.

I think it was the thought that I could dance and just have fun while connecting with body and mind energy that made me sign up.  I haven’t regretted one minute of it.  I love it!  Nia combines martial arts, yoga,  healing arts, and dance arts.  As we dance, we move from sumo warrior-type stances, to sensual hip rotations, to ball-room dance type foot movements, to holding and releasing energy movements, and many movements in between that I can’t even define.  Did I already say that I love it?  At first, I was shy and when everyone did the warrior movements with a bit of force and a powerful “Ha!”, I kept quiet.  Now, I’m as forceful as anyone.  As for the sensual dance:  I love the feeling – it releases and honors all of my feminine nature.   I’m learning about moving energy through, around, in and out of my body and the space around me. We have one move, that the instructor calls The Energy Ball, that is fun, yet powerful and makes me smile every time.

Do I mess up? Yes.  Does it take me a few times to learn a new move?  Yes.  Does that bother me?  No.  Not anymore.  Not at this class.  I go home after every class feeling feminine, confident, and radiant.

So why did I wait so long?  Why did I stay on the sidelines, feeling shy and awkward, for all these years?  I’ve decided that trying to answer this serves little purpose.  I can only honor my time in the now and be grateful for whatever changes have allowed me the courage begin to step into my dreams.   Learning to dance has opened my heart and mind to more than just movement of my legs and arms.

So, this time, I choose to dance.  And next time, I’ll recognize  my longings and know how beautiful it feels to honor them.   I’ll spend less time on the sidelines and more time dancing through life.

How about you?  Are you going to sit it out and watch with secret longing, or are you going to dance?

With love and peace,

Patti